No matter what it is, you corpse-pose through it like everyone else.
Catalyzing drama is sometimes a choice. Acting in drama always is.
Heaven is inconceivable, like Jimmy Carter’s third term.
An explicit polaroid, an unlabeled VHS tape, a long-distance phone card, a single match: the average purse contents circa 2029.
What do you whistle to yourself when you piss into the Grand Canyon?
A street of burning cars is a problem; take a moment to think whether it is your problem.
Ask your mom what kind of syndrome she thinks you’d be named after if you only applied yourself. Your dad would say your name is only worth an effect.
A bachelor/ette party is a dictatorship in laboratory conditions.
How differently you’d look at January 6 if it was February 14.
No one who believes in fate believes they’re fated to end up covered by a tarp. Strange.
Never mind the frameless bed. If she ignores the blood-like flecks on the wall, date her. If she wants more, propose.
Be careful about being literal with someone who is bound by taste to be figurative.
What is your dream playlist for when you’re beheaded for subverting sovereign authority?
How many times a day do you violate the moon’s no-contact order?
Modern man’s morality: laughing at “silent but deadly”; embracing “evil but cozy.”
Do you think that the inventor of steampunk lives their life in shame?
The whole world turns clown when your heart is broken by one.
Letters that land like unsanctioned missiles, signed with “Kisses like suspicious capsules.”
The more beautiful to read on paper, the less appealing to experience in life. “Ligature,” for instance.
How often does “Future Unabomber” show up in your Contacts list? Do you order them by chronology or likelihood?
Some live on in your memory like druids: little-known, poorly understood, probably not that special.
Steps to follow if you wish to steal any one of these: (1) hesitate; (2) hesitate further and more haltingly; (3) submit a polite written request; (4) fuck off; (5) eat a whole bottle of Tums in a bowl with milk.
Your passport can say “America” even as your Twin Peaks aura reading says “Saskatoon.”
Saying that you pulled your idea out of the air only tells the world that it inhales devastating truths and exhales abominable secrets.
If you’re threatened with a good time and it’s not a monster truck rally, you’re entitled to restitution.
Every day is leg day when you’re running from your demons.
Corporeal spaces feel entitled to your phantasmal presence. Ghost them; haunt nothing.
If you die tragically in a condo they will leave you as they found you. If you die triumphantly in a condo they will preserve the moment in flame.
You mistake aristocracy as being rooted in wealth when it is actually in bearing. You see that the vulture is ugly and that it eats corpses; you ignore its senatorial austerity in being and doing so.
You can’t say that your life is a bottomless pit if you never started digging.